The nature of a contract is such that one party expects the other to fulfill their obligations for shared benefits.

If one party fails to uphold their end of the agreement, the contract breaks down.

This is also applicable in Islamic marriage.

Regrettably, plenty of Muslims enter marriage not understanding the contract they are agreeing to.

They often recite lines like “I’m marrying you with the Book of Allah” but may not fully comprehend what that means. But the terms here are legal agreements based on rules and regulations.

Problems often arise when one party fails to adhere to the contract. Most of the time, the other party might not even realize their rights are being violated because they didn’t understand the contract in the first place. This unawareness can, unfortunately, lead to a string of disasters.

Humans are quite skilled at entering into dysfunctional relationships.

We’ll see this with siblings who know exactly what to say to rile each other up and then delight in the reactions. Such behavior, while amusing in children, is detrimental in adults. A couple can quickly learn how to press each other’s buttons, and it can lead to a cycle of violence as this becomes their primary form of interaction.

Unhealthy relationships are often challenging to escape from due to the unhealthy satisfaction derived from them. However, these issues can be avoided by understanding the marriage contract before entering it. Allah says that men and women have their rights within a marriage contract.

Among these rights, men's primary responsibility is to maintain women, mostly related to caring for and providing for children. Children require around twelve years to become independent. As such, men need to provide their wives with the ability to care for their children.

Mercy and modesty are Islam’s two main attributes.

Allah will bless us with his mercy if we are modest in doing anything that would displease Him.

The beauty of a home exists where these virtues—mercy and modesty—are nurtured in our children. They need to learn how to be compassionate with one another and animals, and we are best taught these virtues from our mothers. Teach them to acknowledge the sentient creature in the cat and, most importantly, let them know that it feels pain just like they do when they pull its tail.

Remember, we agreed to the terms of this contract when we declared, “I’m marrying you with the Book of Allah,” and as such, we must fulfill our obligations.

So, let’s consider conjugal rights and responsibilities, educate ourselves, and enter marriage with understanding, compassion, and maturity.

PS: We’re working with Sister Ramsha, a fellow Daily Sunnah community member, to offer our readers 30 days of free access to her book club, which is dedicated to helping sisters grow spiritually and pursue a fulfilling marriage. The offer is open to the 20 first readers who sign up within 48 hours.

You can learn more below or email her at [email protected].